Anna

A short story by blublaise
"Anna"



Prologue
    •ж•

"I'm leaving you." 

Those words. Piercing through me. So painful, so painful. But that pain is only so temporary. This hollow numbness quickly replaces it. My hands pause from chopping vegetables, my fingers gripping the knife's handle. I'm trembling. Trembling so much I didn't know what to do. 

"What?" 

I couldn't turn. I was too afraid to see his face. I'm trembling. My hand is hurting; I'm gripping the handle too hard. I can't let it go. 

Don't say it. Not another time. Tell me you're lying. 

"I said I'm leaving you." 

A sliver of water drips down from my cheek. It's burning me. Burning my skin with an invisible fire. He's lying. He's always teasing me so. I shouldn't take it seriously. 

But why am I crying so hard?

"No." 

My voice is also trembling. It's cracking. I can't control anything. What's happening to me? It's a joke! A joke! He's just playing! 

"Anna..." 

Why is your voice so gentle? You're joking, so why do you say my name so gently? Stop it. Why are you doing this? 

"I SAID NO!"

I'm screaming. I'm trembling so terribly. Why is he playing such a cruel, cruel joke? Why isn't his arms around me, kissing my cheek so lovingly like he usually does? Why do you feel so far away? 

"Anna, calm down. You know this day would come."

I never wanted it to come! Why are you saying such things?! Stop joking! I don't like this. I'm gripping the handle so hard. I might break it. Why are my eyes so wet? Everything is getting blurry. 

"No. No, no, no, NO!" 

I'm screaming again. It's all his fault. Why is he making me scream? Can't he understand? I'm trembling so badly. 

"You have to let go, Anna. Let me go." 

I'm at my limit. I turn so abruptly and lift the knife I'm holding onto so tightly. 

"I ALREADY SAID NO!" 

       •ж•

A Day Out of a Thousand
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The day I met him, I can never forget. I was eighteen years old, and it was just a few weeks after high school graduation. It was a beautiful summer day, a Sunday. The holy day. It was fate...

I was on the fields nearby the creek, camera dangling from my fingers as I captured the moments when the breeze blew by, the sun's reflection on the clear water. I walked aimlessly until I bumped into him. 

He was lying underneath an apple tree, apples surrounding him. His eyes were closed in a nap. His bronze hair playing with the breeze. He was so beautiful; I just had to capture him. 

I edge closer, trying to get a good angle. He woke up at the click of my camera. 

"What are you doing?" he asked me. His voice was beautiful. Everything about him was just so poetic, and my heart nearly broke at the beauty of it all. 

I flushed with pleasure at hearing his voice. "Ah—that. I'm pursuing photography, so, um, I thought you looked really beautiful so I took a picture of you," I stuttered. What a joke I was compared to him! Who would've known he'd fall in love with me as well?

He chuckled; it was a lovely sound. "Beautiful?" he teased. "That's the first feminine compliment I've received." 

"It's not strictly feminine!" I exclaimed. "'Beautiful' could describe men, too. I'm not calling you gay or whatever. It's just that—well, there was some sort of poetic beauty about you that I had to capture it. 'Handsome' just doesn't cut it." 

He smiled. It was a smile that took my breath away. "Oh, is that so? I thought 'handsome' and 'beautiful' were synonyms?" 

I laughed curtly. "Well, if that's really the case, why are you complaining about me calling you 'beautiful'?" I countered. 

He laughed again. "You got me there," he commended. 

I flushed. "And besides," I continued, avoiding his eyes,"such words are conveyed at different levels. Kind of like emotion. 'Love' and 'like' may be synonyms in certain cases, but they're at different levels from one another, you know?" I took a split second glance at him and blushed. He was giving me such an intense, amused stare that made my stomach all fluttery. 

"Really? So how would you convey what you feel about me?" He rested his chin on the palm of his hand, in which a silver ring glinted from his second to last finger. He was leaning closer. 

I bit my lip and met his eyes. "Ah, well. I can't express such a thing in words, you see..." 

His eyebrow lifted. "Oh, really?" 

"Mm-hm..."

"Well, then, how would you express it?" he asked, so much closer. 

I laughed, blushing leisurely. "Ah, you have to keep this a secret from your wife."

"Yeah?" he queried, his breath mingling with mine. 

I bit my lip. "Oh, yes. Or else she'll be angry once she finds out you've been fiddling with the young dame in the fields," I replied. 

"I see," he said. "Well, she'd be very surprised to find out that she and the young dame from the fields are one and the same." 

"Is that so?"

"Mm-hm." 

I laughed and kissed him. He always loved to tease me. That day was our second anniversary. Such a lovely spring day. 


      •ж•

Silent Lover
      •ж•

"I love you," I whispered, wrapping my arms around his waist. "So, so much." 

He didn't turn, nor did he say anything. His eyes stared off in the distance. I wonder what he's thinking. 

"Why aren't you answering me?" I asked, tightening my hold. 

He remained silent. Why isn't he answering me? Why? Why is he ignoring me? 

"Are you mad about what Daniel and I did? Don't worry, he kissed me. He's the one who forced himself on me. I don't love him. I only love you. Only you. I only need you, Sam," I murmured, kissing his neck. He still didn't answer me. 

Tears started sliding down my cheek. I tightened my hold on him. "I'll never let you go..." 

      •ж•
Dinner
      •ж•

I placed the last platter onto the dinner table. I smiled at Sam as I sat down across from him. 

"I made dinner, Sam. Your favorites. You can eat now," I said cheerfully, helping him put food onto his plate. 

His eyes did not meet mine and he didn't answer my cheerful exclamations. I ate and told him about my day at work. He remained unmoving, not touching his food. 

I put my fork down. "Why aren't you eating? Are you sick? Did you pull your stitches?" I asked worriedly. I am a good wife. I take care of my husband. I love him. I love him so much. 

"No," he said. 

I got up and brushed his hair from his forehead. I kissed the stitches there lovingly and held his hand. "It's alright if you're not hungry," I murmured. "You can go to sleep, if you're tired."


      •ж•
The Horrible Truth
      •ж•

"Ah, Jen, it's nice to be out every once and a while...," I sighed, sipping a cup of coffee as I sat across my best friend in a cafe. 

She smiled warmly. "Ah, yes. You're always spending your time alone in that house of yours," she replied. 

"Alone? I've got Sam with me." 

Her eyes filled with pity as she put her hand consolingly on mine. Why? Why is there pity in her eyes? "Anna..." 

I blinked. "What? Why are you looking that way at me?" 

"You know why. You've always been like this since the accident."

My grip tightened on my cup. "What accident? Jen, what are you talking about?" 

"Don't make me say it, Anna," she cautioned, looking away. 

"GOD DAMMIT, JEN!" I yelled, banging my hand on the table. Several eyes turned toward us. 

"Anna, calm down. You're catching attention!" 

"Then tell me what you're talking about," I whispered intensely, my teeth gritting. My heart pounding. I didn't really want to know. But why am I asking if I don't? Why am I doing this? 

Jen swallowed. Her voice was ever so low. "You've always acted this way ever since the car accident. Ever since that day when a truck crashed into his car when he was with his mistress. You know that." 

My eyes widened. "But he left her, you know? He loves me. That's why he came back to me. Jen, you're silly. Why are you bringing this up? He's been with me ever since," I laughed. 

"Anna..." There she goes again. Consoling me. 

"WHAT? Why are you acting this way?!" I exclaimed. I stood up. I was so fed up. 

And so was she. "ANNA! You know why! But you just can't accept the truth! YOU CAN'T ACCEPT THAT SAM IS DEAD! He's dead, Anna! Why do you keep fooling yourself?! Why are you doing this to yourself?! Anna, you're my best friend! You need help!" she yelled after me. 

My heart stopped. Everything blurred and I swayed. I slowly turned around. I laughed. "Jen, you silly girl. Sam is alive. He's alive! Look, if you come over at my house, I'll show you. I'll prove you wrong, Jen," I said, taking her by the wrist and pulling her out of the cafe. 

      •ж•
Over for Dinner
      •ж•

"Follow me upstairs, Jen. He's usually asleep at this time," I said, climbing up the stairs. 

I heard Jen follow me up slowly. "Anna," she gasped,"what is that God awful smell?!" 

"You're silly, Jen." 

She pulled me around. "I don't know what you're playing, Anna. Stop this. Stop it right now. Sam's dead." 

A numbness washed over me again. But I pulled myself together. "No. And I'll prove it to you. Come." I pulled away from her and opened my bedroom door. "Sam? Are you awake?" I called. 

He didn't answer. 

"He's probably asleep." From the corner of my eye, I saw Jen gag. I pulled her in and pointed at the lump on the bed. "He's sleeping right now..." I pulled the sheets away. 

"God, Anna!" Jen exclaimed, holding her hands over mouth and nose. "You kept him here all this time? Anna, wake up! He's decaying! How could you live with this?!" 

"How dare you! How dare you say such things in my house!" I yelled. 

"I need to get out of here. I'm calling the police—anyone. Keeping a dead body is not good, Anna," she said. 

What? They'll take my Sam away?! "No, no, NO! I won't let you, Jen!" 

I chased after her. She reached the stairs. How can I stop her? How? 

I ran and pushed her down. She landed at the bottom with a thud and a gasp. She looked at me with fear. "Anna, please..." 

I slowly went down the stairs. She crawled away, toward the back door in the kitchen. "Why do you want to take him away from me, Jen? I thought you were my best friend."

She groaned as she dragged herself, trying get away from me. "Why are you so afraid of me, best friend? Why do you want to ruin everything, best friend?" I paused at the bottom of the stairs. "Why did you cheat with my husband, BEST FRIEND?" 

She screamed as I stepped on her arm. A crunch erupted from it, but she still continued to drag herself away. I picked up the knife from the counter. 

"I hate you, best friend," I whispered. 


      •ж•
Final Good-bye
      •ж•

"I'm leaving you." 

"What?" 

"I said I'm leaving you." 

"No."

"Anna..."

"I SAID NO!"

"Anna, calm down. You know this day would come."

"No. No, no, no, NO!"

"You have to let go, Anna. Let me go."

"I ALREADY SAID NO!" I yelled. "I'VE LOST YOU ONCE, I CAN'T LOSE YOU AGAIN!" 

He came over to me, lowering my raised hand. "I loved you, Anna..." 

I wrapped my arms around him. "I love you. I love you so much, Sam. Why did you leave me?" 

My tears are falling non-stop. I can't see his face anymore. 

"I loved you." 

"Don't leave me again..." 

"Then, you know what to do, Anna." His lips were on my ears, whispering, whispering. "Do it, Anna." 

"Yes, I'll do it for you." 

Die.