Anna

A short story by blublaise
"Anna"



Prologue
    •ж•

"I'm leaving you." 

Those words. Piercing through me. So painful, so painful. But that pain is only so temporary. This hollow numbness quickly replaces it. My hands pause from chopping vegetables, my fingers gripping the knife's handle. I'm trembling. Trembling so much I didn't know what to do. 

"What?" 

I couldn't turn. I was too afraid to see his face. I'm trembling. My hand is hurting; I'm gripping the handle too hard. I can't let it go. 

Don't say it. Not another time. Tell me you're lying. 

"I said I'm leaving you." 

A sliver of water drips down from my cheek. It's burning me. Burning my skin with an invisible fire. He's lying. He's always teasing me so. I shouldn't take it seriously. 

But why am I crying so hard?

"No." 

My voice is also trembling. It's cracking. I can't control anything. What's happening to me? It's a joke! A joke! He's just playing! 

"Anna..." 

Why is your voice so gentle? You're joking, so why do you say my name so gently? Stop it. Why are you doing this? 

"I SAID NO!"

I'm screaming. I'm trembling so terribly. Why is he playing such a cruel, cruel joke? Why isn't his arms around me, kissing my cheek so lovingly like he usually does? Why do you feel so far away? 

"Anna, calm down. You know this day would come."

I never wanted it to come! Why are you saying such things?! Stop joking! I don't like this. I'm gripping the handle so hard. I might break it. Why are my eyes so wet? Everything is getting blurry. 

"No. No, no, no, NO!" 

I'm screaming again. It's all his fault. Why is he making me scream? Can't he understand? I'm trembling so badly. 

"You have to let go, Anna. Let me go." 

I'm at my limit. I turn so abruptly and lift the knife I'm holding onto so tightly. 

"I ALREADY SAID NO!" 

       •ж•

A Day Out of a Thousand
      •ж•

The day I met him, I can never forget. I was eighteen years old, and it was just a few weeks after high school graduation. It was a beautiful summer day, a Sunday. The holy day. It was fate...

I was on the fields nearby the creek, camera dangling from my fingers as I captured the moments when the breeze blew by, the sun's reflection on the clear water. I walked aimlessly until I bumped into him. 

He was lying underneath an apple tree, apples surrounding him. His eyes were closed in a nap. His bronze hair playing with the breeze. He was so beautiful; I just had to capture him. 

I edge closer, trying to get a good angle. He woke up at the click of my camera. 

"What are you doing?" he asked me. His voice was beautiful. Everything about him was just so poetic, and my heart nearly broke at the beauty of it all. 

I flushed with pleasure at hearing his voice. "Ah—that. I'm pursuing photography, so, um, I thought you looked really beautiful so I took a picture of you," I stuttered. What a joke I was compared to him! Who would've known he'd fall in love with me as well?

He chuckled; it was a lovely sound. "Beautiful?" he teased. "That's the first feminine compliment I've received." 

"It's not strictly feminine!" I exclaimed. "'Beautiful' could describe men, too. I'm not calling you gay or whatever. It's just that—well, there was some sort of poetic beauty about you that I had to capture it. 'Handsome' just doesn't cut it." 

He smiled. It was a smile that took my breath away. "Oh, is that so? I thought 'handsome' and 'beautiful' were synonyms?" 

I laughed curtly. "Well, if that's really the case, why are you complaining about me calling you 'beautiful'?" I countered. 

He laughed again. "You got me there," he commended. 

I flushed. "And besides," I continued, avoiding his eyes,"such words are conveyed at different levels. Kind of like emotion. 'Love' and 'like' may be synonyms in certain cases, but they're at different levels from one another, you know?" I took a split second glance at him and blushed. He was giving me such an intense, amused stare that made my stomach all fluttery. 

"Really? So how would you convey what you feel about me?" He rested his chin on the palm of his hand, in which a silver ring glinted from his second to last finger. He was leaning closer. 

I bit my lip and met his eyes. "Ah, well. I can't express such a thing in words, you see..." 

His eyebrow lifted. "Oh, really?" 

"Mm-hm..."

"Well, then, how would you express it?" he asked, so much closer. 

I laughed, blushing leisurely. "Ah, you have to keep this a secret from your wife."

"Yeah?" he queried, his breath mingling with mine. 

I bit my lip. "Oh, yes. Or else she'll be angry once she finds out you've been fiddling with the young dame in the fields," I replied. 

"I see," he said. "Well, she'd be very surprised to find out that she and the young dame from the fields are one and the same." 

"Is that so?"

"Mm-hm." 

I laughed and kissed him. He always loved to tease me. That day was our second anniversary. Such a lovely spring day. 


      •ж•

Silent Lover
      •ж•

"I love you," I whispered, wrapping my arms around his waist. "So, so much." 

He didn't turn, nor did he say anything. His eyes stared off in the distance. I wonder what he's thinking. 

"Why aren't you answering me?" I asked, tightening my hold. 

He remained silent. Why isn't he answering me? Why? Why is he ignoring me? 

"Are you mad about what Daniel and I did? Don't worry, he kissed me. He's the one who forced himself on me. I don't love him. I only love you. Only you. I only need you, Sam," I murmured, kissing his neck. He still didn't answer me. 

Tears started sliding down my cheek. I tightened my hold on him. "I'll never let you go..." 

      •ж•
Dinner
      •ж•

I placed the last platter onto the dinner table. I smiled at Sam as I sat down across from him. 

"I made dinner, Sam. Your favorites. You can eat now," I said cheerfully, helping him put food onto his plate. 

His eyes did not meet mine and he didn't answer my cheerful exclamations. I ate and told him about my day at work. He remained unmoving, not touching his food. 

I put my fork down. "Why aren't you eating? Are you sick? Did you pull your stitches?" I asked worriedly. I am a good wife. I take care of my husband. I love him. I love him so much. 

"No," he said. 

I got up and brushed his hair from his forehead. I kissed the stitches there lovingly and held his hand. "It's alright if you're not hungry," I murmured. "You can go to sleep, if you're tired."


      •ж•
The Horrible Truth
      •ж•

"Ah, Jen, it's nice to be out every once and a while...," I sighed, sipping a cup of coffee as I sat across my best friend in a cafe. 

She smiled warmly. "Ah, yes. You're always spending your time alone in that house of yours," she replied. 

"Alone? I've got Sam with me." 

Her eyes filled with pity as she put her hand consolingly on mine. Why? Why is there pity in her eyes? "Anna..." 

I blinked. "What? Why are you looking that way at me?" 

"You know why. You've always been like this since the accident."

My grip tightened on my cup. "What accident? Jen, what are you talking about?" 

"Don't make me say it, Anna," she cautioned, looking away. 

"GOD DAMMIT, JEN!" I yelled, banging my hand on the table. Several eyes turned toward us. 

"Anna, calm down. You're catching attention!" 

"Then tell me what you're talking about," I whispered intensely, my teeth gritting. My heart pounding. I didn't really want to know. But why am I asking if I don't? Why am I doing this? 

Jen swallowed. Her voice was ever so low. "You've always acted this way ever since the car accident. Ever since that day when a truck crashed into his car when he was with his mistress. You know that." 

My eyes widened. "But he left her, you know? He loves me. That's why he came back to me. Jen, you're silly. Why are you bringing this up? He's been with me ever since," I laughed. 

"Anna..." There she goes again. Consoling me. 

"WHAT? Why are you acting this way?!" I exclaimed. I stood up. I was so fed up. 

And so was she. "ANNA! You know why! But you just can't accept the truth! YOU CAN'T ACCEPT THAT SAM IS DEAD! He's dead, Anna! Why do you keep fooling yourself?! Why are you doing this to yourself?! Anna, you're my best friend! You need help!" she yelled after me. 

My heart stopped. Everything blurred and I swayed. I slowly turned around. I laughed. "Jen, you silly girl. Sam is alive. He's alive! Look, if you come over at my house, I'll show you. I'll prove you wrong, Jen," I said, taking her by the wrist and pulling her out of the cafe. 

      •ж•
Over for Dinner
      •ж•

"Follow me upstairs, Jen. He's usually asleep at this time," I said, climbing up the stairs. 

I heard Jen follow me up slowly. "Anna," she gasped,"what is that God awful smell?!" 

"You're silly, Jen." 

She pulled me around. "I don't know what you're playing, Anna. Stop this. Stop it right now. Sam's dead." 

A numbness washed over me again. But I pulled myself together. "No. And I'll prove it to you. Come." I pulled away from her and opened my bedroom door. "Sam? Are you awake?" I called. 

He didn't answer. 

"He's probably asleep." From the corner of my eye, I saw Jen gag. I pulled her in and pointed at the lump on the bed. "He's sleeping right now..." I pulled the sheets away. 

"God, Anna!" Jen exclaimed, holding her hands over mouth and nose. "You kept him here all this time? Anna, wake up! He's decaying! How could you live with this?!" 

"How dare you! How dare you say such things in my house!" I yelled. 

"I need to get out of here. I'm calling the police—anyone. Keeping a dead body is not good, Anna," she said. 

What? They'll take my Sam away?! "No, no, NO! I won't let you, Jen!" 

I chased after her. She reached the stairs. How can I stop her? How? 

I ran and pushed her down. She landed at the bottom with a thud and a gasp. She looked at me with fear. "Anna, please..." 

I slowly went down the stairs. She crawled away, toward the back door in the kitchen. "Why do you want to take him away from me, Jen? I thought you were my best friend."

She groaned as she dragged herself, trying get away from me. "Why are you so afraid of me, best friend? Why do you want to ruin everything, best friend?" I paused at the bottom of the stairs. "Why did you cheat with my husband, BEST FRIEND?" 

She screamed as I stepped on her arm. A crunch erupted from it, but she still continued to drag herself away. I picked up the knife from the counter. 

"I hate you, best friend," I whispered. 


      •ж•
Final Good-bye
      •ж•

"I'm leaving you." 

"What?" 

"I said I'm leaving you." 

"No."

"Anna..."

"I SAID NO!"

"Anna, calm down. You know this day would come."

"No. No, no, no, NO!"

"You have to let go, Anna. Let me go."

"I ALREADY SAID NO!" I yelled. "I'VE LOST YOU ONCE, I CAN'T LOSE YOU AGAIN!" 

He came over to me, lowering my raised hand. "I loved you, Anna..." 

I wrapped my arms around him. "I love you. I love you so much, Sam. Why did you leave me?" 

My tears are falling non-stop. I can't see his face anymore. 

"I loved you." 

"Don't leave me again..." 

"Then, you know what to do, Anna." His lips were on my ears, whispering, whispering. "Do it, Anna." 

"Yes, I'll do it for you." 

Die. 

Dawson's Creek: Characters

Yes. I am a semi-fan of Dawson's Creek. Don't shoot me.

Joey Potter: Best character ever! Though I am not found of Katie Holmes's execution of Joey. I'm not a fan of her acting.

Pacey Witter: Badass man! 'Nuff said.

Dawson Leery: Annoying as hell. Hate him soooo much. He's like your typical shoujo heroine—only he's a guy. Let's all decide he's gay, then.

Jen (something): Meh. I don't like her, but I don't hate her. She's an in between.

Andie: Sweet, nice, likable.

Jack: Wait... He's gay?

Friends

My friends, all of them, are super awesome and make me feel super happy. I couldn't have asked for better friends. Here are some things that make me feel special:

Soraya's smiles when she laughs at my jokes
Marisa's hugs when she's sad or when she's happy
Anna's annoying pokes and hair pulling
Manny showing me his serious side and warm smiles
Chris's... Friendliness =D
Alyssa's respect for me
Emily and Paula's keeping up with my craziness
Sharlynn's hugs, smiles, and overall friendship
Santi's attempts at making me laugh
Seb V.'s kindness
Seb F.'s... Uhmm... IDK?
Cruz's friendship
Giana's hugs and squirreliness
Rocky's niceness and... Being Rockyness
Angel's jokes XP
Lucas's craziness
Marcella's sweetness and friendliness
Erica#6's randomness and ball-magnetness
Erica#7's insanity<3 and trust
Amber(8A)'s quirkiness and honesty


A few more things, but those are a few honorable mentions off the top of my head.

WUV CHU FWIENDS<3

....

When it comes to looking badass, Batman totally beats Superman, hands down. I mean seriously. Let's look at the contestants:

Batman: Sexy and in all black.

Superman: Gay brief over gay tights, and colors that are bright(otherwise known as gay).

Get my point? Last I checked, gay does not = badass.

I LOVE TURTLES

Yes. Yes, I do. Do you dare question meh???

Blargh, this is so random. Anyway, I feel like posting what's on my mind.

Turtles are so green. Their shells kind of remind me of emeralds. Emeralds were my former best friend(s) birthstone. Yep. May bloomers. Anyhow, I think it's strange that turtles have beaks. I mean, they're freaking reptiles!! Not birds!! Sure, platypi(? Or is it platypuses, platypeese, platypusen???) also have beaks, but it's okay coz they can be secret agents. Turtles are not good secret agents. They're too green. And weird. I think turtles should have tongues like snakes. That'd be cool. But then, they'd look more freaky... Anyway, I still don't know the difference between a turtle and a tortoise. Actually, scratch that. More like, I always forget. Darn ADD. *slaps self* OW!!!

Bleh, anyway, I think turtles are cute. They should be the new trend in pandaism(is that even a word???). I once had two pet turtles named Ivy Leaf and Forest. They were like two inches long. Not even. One and a half. Ja. I wonder how birds reproduce. Turtles have very good swimming skills. Ivy Leaf and Forest were pro swimmers. They should be in the Olympics. Did I spell that right? Whatevs. Anyhow, turtles sure like their veggies. They probably would never get in trouble with their parents in the dinner table. Lucky brats. I envy them.

Well

First off, long time no post! It's strange, after being gone for so long...

Anyhow! I checked my statistics for this blog, and I have to say, I'm thoroughly impressed! I have viewers from three countries! Three!! USA, Canada, and Germany. I'm impressed. Truthfully, I don't really take this blog seriously. It's just for fun. But, I'm really impressed!!!

Also, I have decided to cancel all publication of my works on WattPad. I just DO NOT have the time to work on the stories, or any stories whatsoever. But, I might pick up these stories again later on and continue it. So consider me on hiatus.

Further updates... The first volleyball game of the season is this Saturday. Buddies from my school, YOU ISH WELCOME TO WATCH! Also, see you guys on the picnic on Sunday!!!

Gah, a few complaints about the schoolyear: First day of school, TOO MUCH DARN HOMEWORK. WHY?! TEST IN A FEW DAYS. WHY?! HECTIC SCHEDULE. WHY?! TOP FLOOR; MORE STEPS TO CLIMB. WHY?! /nag/nag/nag

Song of the Day

God, I love this song so much. It's so laid back, and, well, totally fits the title.

Drunk Again by Reel Big Fish

If I had a dollar bill for every time Ive been wrong
Id be a self-made millionaire and youd still be gone
So hand me down my best dress shoes and my best dress shirt
Cause Im going out in style to cover the hurt
And all I wanna do all day is spend it in bed
But thats bad for the body and even worse for my head
So Ill try and find a place where no one will ask me a thing
Itll help to forget and help me to sing

Cause now Im drunk again
The means to my end
And Im scared of myself
Cause now its the same the faces and names
And Im scared of myself again

Have you ever wanted to wake up from your dreaming
Scared you so bad you couldnt control your heart or your breathing
Well walk out the door with me on the floor
You dont care how Im feeling
I guess a weak and tired and frightened man is no longer appealing

Some people have a gift of reaching right into your soul
and finding the whole and making it
bigger
Baby sometimes I think I catch ya crackin cynical smiles
and in a short while youll be my
hearts grave digger
Well theres not much I can do
Cause Im at the mercy of you
So baby I guess were through

Cause now Im drunk again
The means to my end
And Im scared of myself
Cause now its the same the faces and names
And Im scared of myself again
Cause now its all the same the faces and the names
So go walk out the door you dont believe me no more
And Im scared of myself again

If I had a dollar bill for every time I been wrong
Id be a self made millionaire and I wouldnt be singing